this is how i feel
@:29, 1:01
Monday, November 29, 2010
Tuesday, November 2, 2010
the evolution of society
When we look back in time and see who ruled the music scene throughout the ages and we see the Beatles dominating the 60s, Michael Jackson in 80/90s and Nirvana in the 90s etc, and then we come to 2010 and lady gaga and Justin Bieber are on top of the music scene and all I think is our kids are going to laugh at us. No one will be listening to gaga or Bieber in 50 years time. What happened to the most popular music being about the best music, not the youngest kid that can sing, or the female who creates the most controversy. Im not hating on Bieber or Gaga, im simply voicing my disappointment in society’s music choices as a whole.
Monday, November 1, 2010
Sunday, October 31, 2010
Up in the air
also, i cant see myself old. like its hard to picture having a house with a wife and kids (maybe).
i guess its cos the last 4 years have been pretty predictable, even the last 21, going to school, going to uni, studying my ass off instead of partying.
now its like we can do so much, there are so many decisions we can make that can change our lives for completely.
i dont think i cant picture myself old beacuse im not going to do that, beacuse im going to be different and do what i want but i think its cos i dont want to picture it, i would like to stay this age for a while longer. i guess ive got at least 10 years to go of what i would call youngish. and by then i will more then likely want something different, esp if i meet the right girl.
im going to copy this into a blog.
i guess its cos the last 4 years have been pretty predictable, even the last 21, going to school, going to uni, studying my ass off instead of partying.
now its like we can do so much, there are so many decisions we can make that can change our lives for completely.
i dont think i cant picture myself old beacuse im not going to do that, beacuse im going to be different and do what i want but i think its cos i dont want to picture it, i would like to stay this age for a while longer. i guess ive got at least 10 years to go of what i would call youngish. and by then i will more then likely want something different, esp if i meet the right girl.
im going to copy this into a blog.
Tuesday, October 12, 2010
Tuesday, September 14, 2010
listening to swedish music looking at my photos, wishing i was back.
84 days to go, i think.
http://www.flickr.com/photos/bestill_d
----------------
Now playing: avner - bed för mig
via FoxyTunes
84 days to go, i think.
http://www.flickr.com/photos/bestill_d
----------------
Now playing: avner - bed för mig
via FoxyTunes
Monday, September 6, 2010
Note to self + ramble
have transferred all of my thoughts onto twitter. its a bit more boring but quicker.
right now my life consists of
uni work
seeing friends twice a week, friday and saturday night. sometimes both, sometimes neither.
my dog recently bit me, it changed our relationship to be honest, i trust him a lot less and see him more as a dog then as my friend. he is no longer my favourite being in the world.
i know have none.
it is like i lied to myself, telling myself that he loves me, that he could be an adequate companion with in my life, as humans are so unreliable and he has no choice but to stay and love me, or else he gets no food.
he is the definition of what it means to be a living organism, spend all your time doing everything you can to get some food and reproduce. although as his balls are currently, and have been for some time, detached from le pénis he has a lower desire to mate.
my favourite song is Ellen dritter gesang (ave maria)by Franz Schubert, some composer who is, according to at least one fan, in some respects better then Beethoven considering the difference in life span. I wish to be killed to that song, or at least have it played at my funeral.
i started watching mad men, ive been meaning to for some time now but never got into it on tv, it is actually quite good, only watched one ep and already a fair amount of character development and the foundation for conflicts has been laid.
i started talking to my long time ex-ex-ex gf, ie 3 gfs ago, via email, which included long conversations, until she got fired, or something then she stopped replying i didnt mind so much and in fact forgot about it after the first day. i like her and would definitely sleep with her but she has a bf and dosnt want me, perhaps she is slightly lonely and just wants a good friend, cos as she explains she has a few ass hole guy friends. most of them i had to meet or hear about at some point in our relationship.
her new bf looks similar to me in some respects, i dont know what that says other then she has a certain taste in guys. i think she is just one of those people that needs a bf, to give her something to do, someone to talk to at any hour of the day, but isnt this what most women want?
i would not know, i have not conquered the female species as such, i have merely tapped into the resources and most times come out scaved and suffering, with lengthy periods of morning.
my life is going to change dramatically very quickly and i dont know how i feel about it. last time my life went through change it took me a year to get back to 60% of what it was. this included, crashing my car and getting a new one, getting vacation work which meant i could spend 2 months in europe the following year, broke up with my gf, got a new one, she broke up with me, started Roaccutane acne medication that FUCKS you up in the head, not in that order.
my new change will include a new job, where by i will no longer be living off $100 a week but a fair bit more. i am (hopefully) graduating from uni and leaving that life behind. study is really the only way of life i know, i have technically been studying for my entire life span 20+ years.
choke, is a book i have been reading, it is pretty cool and only the second book i have every attempted to read by my own will, even then the first one was to impress a girl. problem is, it is about a sex addict and that is difficult when you havnt had sex in, say four months, and havnt had A grade sex in two years now.
im going to europe at the end of the year, with some uni friends, shud be interesting how long i stay with them, my idea of travelling and having fun is slightly different, but at least i can tell ppl im going with someone, because the conversation is extended if i tell them im going by myself, as they go into why, how, and basically its cos they cudnt do it by themselves, most people cant go to the shops by themselves, let alone another fucking country, with a language they dont speak and thousands of miles away from friendly faces. but i think that is the joy of it.
i want to go sky diving next year, it is high on my things to do before i die. i also need to buy a motorbike, jsut so i can get my adrenaline glands emitting chemicals into my brain again.
life in general is boring. being a realist, i am enjoying my life, esp in compassion to people i know and unfortunate people of the third world.
im shutting up now. going to sleep before i watch another ep of corner gas, mad men or community.
right now my life consists of
uni work
seeing friends twice a week, friday and saturday night. sometimes both, sometimes neither.
my dog recently bit me, it changed our relationship to be honest, i trust him a lot less and see him more as a dog then as my friend. he is no longer my favourite being in the world.
i know have none.
it is like i lied to myself, telling myself that he loves me, that he could be an adequate companion with in my life, as humans are so unreliable and he has no choice but to stay and love me, or else he gets no food.
he is the definition of what it means to be a living organism, spend all your time doing everything you can to get some food and reproduce. although as his balls are currently, and have been for some time, detached from le pénis he has a lower desire to mate.
my favourite song is Ellen dritter gesang (ave maria)by Franz Schubert, some composer who is, according to at least one fan, in some respects better then Beethoven considering the difference in life span. I wish to be killed to that song, or at least have it played at my funeral.
i started watching mad men, ive been meaning to for some time now but never got into it on tv, it is actually quite good, only watched one ep and already a fair amount of character development and the foundation for conflicts has been laid.
i started talking to my long time ex-ex-ex gf, ie 3 gfs ago, via email, which included long conversations, until she got fired, or something then she stopped replying i didnt mind so much and in fact forgot about it after the first day. i like her and would definitely sleep with her but she has a bf and dosnt want me, perhaps she is slightly lonely and just wants a good friend, cos as she explains she has a few ass hole guy friends. most of them i had to meet or hear about at some point in our relationship.
her new bf looks similar to me in some respects, i dont know what that says other then she has a certain taste in guys. i think she is just one of those people that needs a bf, to give her something to do, someone to talk to at any hour of the day, but isnt this what most women want?
i would not know, i have not conquered the female species as such, i have merely tapped into the resources and most times come out scaved and suffering, with lengthy periods of morning.
my life is going to change dramatically very quickly and i dont know how i feel about it. last time my life went through change it took me a year to get back to 60% of what it was. this included, crashing my car and getting a new one, getting vacation work which meant i could spend 2 months in europe the following year, broke up with my gf, got a new one, she broke up with me, started Roaccutane acne medication that FUCKS you up in the head, not in that order.
my new change will include a new job, where by i will no longer be living off $100 a week but a fair bit more. i am (hopefully) graduating from uni and leaving that life behind. study is really the only way of life i know, i have technically been studying for my entire life span 20+ years.
choke, is a book i have been reading, it is pretty cool and only the second book i have every attempted to read by my own will, even then the first one was to impress a girl. problem is, it is about a sex addict and that is difficult when you havnt had sex in, say four months, and havnt had A grade sex in two years now.
im going to europe at the end of the year, with some uni friends, shud be interesting how long i stay with them, my idea of travelling and having fun is slightly different, but at least i can tell ppl im going with someone, because the conversation is extended if i tell them im going by myself, as they go into why, how, and basically its cos they cudnt do it by themselves, most people cant go to the shops by themselves, let alone another fucking country, with a language they dont speak and thousands of miles away from friendly faces. but i think that is the joy of it.
i want to go sky diving next year, it is high on my things to do before i die. i also need to buy a motorbike, jsut so i can get my adrenaline glands emitting chemicals into my brain again.
life in general is boring. being a realist, i am enjoying my life, esp in compassion to people i know and unfortunate people of the third world.
im shutting up now. going to sleep before i watch another ep of corner gas, mad men or community.
Thursday, July 15, 2010
Tuesday, July 13, 2010
Saturday, July 10, 2010
sometimes, when im feeling like i need to leave, need to escape from this place, my home which i love but nevertheless need, from time to time a break, a pause in my somewhat pre planned pre determined life (work 8-5, car, house, wife, kids), of which i do not intend on conforming to, conforming is not what i do, i do not know how, i cant even bring myself to conform to minority groups who are conforming for the greater good, of which is to not conform to the majority, the populations views and actions.
when i feel this need to leave, i do. and if i can not for some reason at some specific point in time
sometimes when im driving, driving to some arbitrary destination in my arbitrary life, i turn off the radio, and turn on the air conditioner - or heater depending on circumstances, to lever four/four, and just drive, preferably on the fwy, simulating the sound and feel of an aeroplane, simulating that feeling of freedom, freedom one can only experience from travelling 12000 kilometres above sea level.
eta sweden: 9 days
eta europe: 122 days
when i feel this need to leave, i do. and if i can not for some reason at some specific point in time
sometimes when im driving, driving to some arbitrary destination in my arbitrary life, i turn off the radio, and turn on the air conditioner - or heater depending on circumstances, to lever four/four, and just drive, preferably on the fwy, simulating the sound and feel of an aeroplane, simulating that feeling of freedom, freedom one can only experience from travelling 12000 kilometres above sea level.
eta sweden: 9 days
eta europe: 122 days
i want that beach
i want that life
the life offered by that isolation
that life of no care
where the only thing that matters are your basic human necessities
i want that freedom
unfortunately i will only ever experience glimpses of what i desire,
and what may or may not have been offered on that beach
although, i do not want the complications that inevitably come from such paradise
Tuesday, June 29, 2010
Saturday, June 12, 2010
Monday, May 31, 2010
will police horses peruse speeding
cars, what if you ran a red light.
what if you were on a horse and
ran a light, would they chase you?
and have a high speed horse chase.
i should get a fast ex racing
horse and try it out.
or taunt them until they peruse
can/will police horses peruse
speeding cars, what if you ran a
red light.
in front of horse police, will
they peruse.
what if you were on a horse and
you ran a light,
would they chase you then.
and have a high speed horse chase.
i should get a fast ex racing
horse and try it out.
or taunt them until they peruse
Black Hawk Down
in high school i was so obsessed with the movie
black hawk down, not only did i analyse it as a
book twice for english, i used a line from it
during a break up
"you know what i thank, it dont matter what i
think"
black hawk down, not only did i analyse it as a
book twice for english, i used a line from it
during a break up
"you know what i thank, it dont matter what i
think"
confused
today i saw an audi with the number plate '1BMW 242', poor thing must be so confused. dosnt fit in anywhere.
teased by other audi's, rejected by bmws. a lost cause, a lost soul.
Wednesday, May 26, 2010
Monday, May 17, 2010
Monday, May 3, 2010
Monday, March 29, 2010
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Thursday, March 25, 2010
Wednesday, March 24, 2010
ever notice that you cant hear a clock ticking unless you look at it.
it seems evident that all old people do is spend their time in doctors waiting rooms and post offices. thats if they can move or think.
the most startled i ever get is when someone opens the door im opening from the other side, because, for a second i think ive opened the door unintentionally with my mind
i wish i could dance 1950s rock and roll style. im sure i would get all the chicks, esp this one
it seems evident that all old people do is spend their time in doctors waiting rooms and post offices. thats if they can move or think.
the most startled i ever get is when someone opens the door im opening from the other side, because, for a second i think ive opened the door unintentionally with my mind
i wish i could dance 1950s rock and roll style. im sure i would get all the chicks, esp this one
Sunday, March 7, 2010
accomplishments
one of my biggest accomplishment was to piss standing
on an aeroplane during heavy turbulence, with a 90%
success rate
on an aeroplane during heavy turbulence, with a 90%
success rate
Thursday, March 4, 2010
Wednesday, March 3, 2010
i think, in my honest opinion, that being a pool boy would not be that easy.
getting leaves out a pool with the hand held thing, ie no help from machines, is not so easy.
sure the first 80% is easy, and the next 10% is just a little harder. but once you get to chasing one leave at a time, begging it to leave the floor of the pool it becomes time consuming.
although, getting paid to do it, with a chance of sex (as desperate housewives insists occurs regularly)
getting leaves out a pool with the hand held thing, ie no help from machines, is not so easy.
sure the first 80% is easy, and the next 10% is just a little harder. but once you get to chasing one leave at a time, begging it to leave the floor of the pool it becomes time consuming.
although, getting paid to do it, with a chance of sex (as desperate housewives insists occurs regularly)
dear shannyn
i was going to write this on your wall but dont think others should read it.
you remember that bottle of water i got from a fair at uni one day. and the water inside looked so perfect and pure, free of any impurities, that i never opened it. well my room got really bad this time and im cleaning it and so i found the bottle, still in the same place its always been, just in case i needed water, i dont know maybe thats why it stayed there, well, im sure you can guess what i did with it.
yes i threw it away.
no not really, i opened it and drank a little. tasted OOOK, no impurities or anything. but then i smelt it
and it smelt like an old room that had been locked for centuries and housed mainly books and the first newspapers that were ever made. not so good.
so i only had like 3 little mouthfuls, just to check the taste.
as im writing this my stomach is not feeling the best, but im going to say its cos im hungry. which im suuure you will agree with despite above.
i think im going to edit this and put this on a blog.
and i watched a good movie - dear wendy and they had two songs by the zombies - time of the season and shes not there. if you havnt already you should download them. you will fall in love with them. maybe, probly not as much as i have though. i made a playlist with only those two songs and listened to them for daaaays.
you remember that bottle of water i got from a fair at uni one day. and the water inside looked so perfect and pure, free of any impurities, that i never opened it. well my room got really bad this time and im cleaning it and so i found the bottle, still in the same place its always been, just in case i needed water, i dont know maybe thats why it stayed there, well, im sure you can guess what i did with it.
yes i threw it away.
no not really, i opened it and drank a little. tasted OOOK, no impurities or anything. but then i smelt it
and it smelt like an old room that had been locked for centuries and housed mainly books and the first newspapers that were ever made. not so good.
so i only had like 3 little mouthfuls, just to check the taste.
as im writing this my stomach is not feeling the best, but im going to say its cos im hungry. which im suuure you will agree with despite above.
i think im going to edit this and put this on a blog.
and i watched a good movie - dear wendy and they had two songs by the zombies - time of the season and shes not there. if you havnt already you should download them. you will fall in love with them. maybe, probly not as much as i have though. i made a playlist with only those two songs and listened to them for daaaays.
Monday, March 1, 2010
i found nemo
i went snorkelling off an island off papua new guinea and after some time swimming, i came across nemo hovering in a sea anemone, just starring at me. lettings its presance to me known, in order to protect its kids or something, while at the same time still shit scared unfinished
Friday, February 12, 2010
owl my friend
i just caught the last train home, arriving at me station before realising i left my keys with someone in the city resulting in me now having to walk home as i can not drive my car which is at the station due to having no keys.
but then! during my walk i noticed there was the most beautiful baby owl sitting on the fence swivelling its head around looking at me from all directions as i walked by, so i continued walking back and forth about a metre away watching it swivel its head all around, easily making up for the fact i forgot my keys.
the world works in mysterious ways.
but then! during my walk i noticed there was the most beautiful baby owl sitting on the fence swivelling its head around looking at me from all directions as i walked by, so i continued walking back and forth about a metre away watching it swivel its head all around, easily making up for the fact i forgot my keys.
the world works in mysterious ways.
Friday, January 29, 2010
pool is fixed
pool is swim-able for the first time since it transformed into a fully qualified backyard swamp 2 years ago.
Saturday, January 23, 2010
bogged in attadale at 3am, who would of thought.
24 hour self service car wash, for the man who just wants his car clean all the time
just realised that 3 years ago whilst visting the kitsune maison store in Paris I was served by the founder and owner. if only I knew it then.
outside kitsune store in paris.
girl modelling kitsunes spring golf collection
Im thinking I should just start conforming to modern trends. I mean I would probably have more friends, more things to do, and it would make buying closes a lot easier.
I'm sick of sleeping on my bed. havnt passed out and awoken in an unknown location in a while.
24 hour self service car wash, for the man who just wants his car clean all the time
just realised that 3 years ago whilst visting the kitsune maison store in Paris I was served by the founder and owner. if only I knew it then.
outside kitsune store in paris.
girl modelling kitsunes spring golf collection
Im thinking I should just start conforming to modern trends. I mean I would probably have more friends, more things to do, and it would make buying closes a lot easier.
I'm sick of sleeping on my bed. havnt passed out and awoken in an unknown location in a while.
Friday, January 22, 2010
Tuesday, January 19, 2010
what happened to little red riding hood
abc kids programming has really gone down hill.
what happened to little red riding hood?
its hard working in an office when your fetish is secretaries
what happened to little red riding hood?
its hard working in an office when your fetish is secretaries
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